Dean Winchester

Claire tells Dean about taking a job for Tony Stark and it descends into a huge argument where they both piss each other off a lot.  Awwww, they really are like family now.

Other-Claire tells Dean her plan to go get the third ring from Chuck Bass ... and when Dean finds out it involves Brooke, he's not a happy camper.  Again.  He tells her about how Chuck's a rapist.

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Some chicks are just freaking insane. 

In which:

  + Spike tells Dean about his crazy ex, Drusilla.
  + Jo cheers Dean up with some manly dart bets.
  + Barney explains the hot-crazy scale.  And what a blog is.
  + Dean and Bela give each other more crap.
  + Brooke calls and Dean explains why he doesn't want her involved with the mission, but in the end she manages to get him to okay it.  Or something.  Chicks are confusing.  HE IS NOT PLEASED THOUGH.  : |
   + When Dean unexpectedly runs into Lisa, he urges her to get Ben out of the city as horrible meteor showers have been wrecking New York.
   + Cassie and Dean talk about family, and she urges him to dump the Claires out of his life.
   + Cutesy!Elle and Dean brainstorm ways to deal with Claires.
   + Liz and Dean discuss Dean and his relationship to women.
   + Silent Bob hears you, bro.
   + Anya slaps Dean again.  And he tries to tell her she doesn't have a very good moral compass, being an ex-demon and all.
   + Jack should write fortune cookies.
   + The Impala sadly waits outside.
   + Dean runs into Buffy again, who asks him how the Apocalypse is going.
   + After everybody else leaves, Sylar comes down to grab a newspaper and... Dean catches him and confronts him about being out of Company lockdown.  Sylar confesses that Ruby busted him out and Dean flips out on him, and drags his ass outside.

Barney > waitforitdary 
Lisa > lisa_braeden 
Silent Bob > hesgotnothin 
Jack > stolethename 

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[Log]  I want you to hit me as hard as you can.  (Sylar, Dean)   Sylar and Dean let out all of the issues that have been cropping up between them out through... violence.  Lots and lots of violence.   And then they go to Applebee's.  It's just how bros roll.

Dean bitches about Claire to Sam, and they argue over Brooke's involvement in their work.

Catwoman is not Batman's friggin' soulmate.

In which:

   +  Shere vehemently agrees.  Dean ends up telling her about the Horsemen's rings and how they have to steal one back from Batman and she offers her assistance .. and blueprints of the Wayne Manor.
   + Nightwing says it's none of Dean's business - which is kind of hypocritical because he goes on to talk about how he's invaded Dean's privacy and knows all about him.  Superheroes these days.  He gives Dean a comlink to use in emergencies for information - that goes straight to Oracle.
   + Serena and Dean discuss sexual tension vs. soulmates.
  + Sylar calls Dean to have a heartwarming conversation about Batman's sexuality, how to ignore Claires, and robbing Batman.
  + The Impala really hopes Bela isn't Dean's soulmate.
  + Dean finds out Brooke's never watched Batman and demands she do, so they make plans to do it that night before he heads out to Gotham.  And they get pizza.
  + Sarah mentions that she knows two geeks who could argue this point pretty well.  And that she's married.  Boo.
  + Marla agrees.
  + Zoe tries to argue that Batman's belt is a fanny pack.  : |
  + Dean confronts Bela about what the rings were and demands that she help them retrieve them.  She agrees to help with the Batman thing.
  + Ellie wonders if all Batman fans are as intense about this issue as Morgan and Chuck.
  + Sheldon has a very, uh, informed opinion on the subject.
  + Logan shares his two cents.
  + Barbara assures Dean Batman is real and he jizzes his little girl panties to learn she's Barbara Gordon.
  + Dean basically admits to Sparky!Elle that he'd bang Bela.
  + Brighid wants to know who Catwoman is.  And why Batman wants to be with her : /
  + Gabriel isn't coming to help, because he's going to go warm Michael that the gods are trying to kill him.  They wish each other luck in a manly... circumlocutory way.
  + Dean explains to Cutesy!Elle that he's not a dork.
  + Pepper can't really comment on that.
  + Claire jumps on Dean's case about how he didn't tell her about the rings (and how he told Dolphin even though he should have been staying away from her).  He tries to defend himself against Claire-logic, and then they plan on how to proceed, deciding that Claire and Sam will go get the ring from Tony Stark, while Dean goes with Bela to Gotham City.

Serena > theviltwin 
Sarah > froyoho 
Zoe > jr_nightstalker 
Ellie  > likepeaches 
Sheldon > thatsmyspot 
Logan > hatespears 
Brighid > daughterof_fate 
Pepper > thankyoumrstark

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Robbing Batman.

Yeah, this'll go great. 

In which:
 
 + Poison Ivy finds Dean to be pretty easy prey.
 + Death just... taunts Dean's life.
 + Alfred tries to warn Dean that this is a shitty idea.
 + Juliet encourages Dean's ego.
 + Dean and Sylar exchange some friendly banter, before Dean remembers he's supposed to be mad at him for killing people.   He asks him about the lockdown and Sylar lies to cover up the fact that Ruby broke him out.  Sylar says he might be able to help Dean if he needs it, but Dean pointedly reminds him that he's stuck ~in prison~.
 + Gwen and Dean discuss his equipment.  ... *ahem*
 + Pest is a dick.
 + Snarky!Elle calls with some encouragement.
 + Harley wants to know what Dean's after.
 + Dennis claims robbing Batman is impossible.
 + Dick is curious how Dean's gonna find him.
  + Shere chastises Dean for his complete fail at being subtle.  They note that they both started a life of 'crime' relatively early.
  + Bela and Shere meet, and Dean realizes exactly what he signed up for here.
  + S3!Verse w/rearmed :  Three words - kryptonite boxer shorts.  
  + Brooke and Dean discuss their 'elevator lists'.   And how Dean prefers brunettes.  Which leads into ... a serious conversation about how many girls he's stuck around for. And they talk briefly and awkwardly about what happened between them, and both apologize.  Brooke asks about Cassie and Dean explains that there's really no chance of that going anywhere anymore but changes the subject abruptly to Stitch.
  + Oh crap, it's the Joker.  But he really just wants to know what Dean's after and what Batman stole.
  + 1966 Batman knows you'll never get away with this, you criminal scum.
  + Dean ends up talking Brighid about his plan and taking her for a spin in the Impala.  They make dinner plans until he learns she's married... to Bruce Wayne.  He quickly exits stage left.
  + Faith accuses him of it being a wedding ring that he's after.
  + Brittany's a little lost, so Dean walks her down to the police station.
  + Dean explains to Cutesy!Elle that the Impala is the Batmobile, and then tells her about the planned heist.  They proceed to argue Dean's dorky fanboy factor.  
  + The Impala is confused at how Dean is going to rob himself.  And even more confused when she learns Dean is serious.  She's not very happy to learn about Bela's involvement either.
  + Rachel tries to warn Dean off this as well.
  + Dean informs Sam that Batman's got a ring.
  + Anna tries to get Dean to proceed with caution but that's... a lost cause.
  + Dean enlists Other-Claire's help hunting down Chuck Bass for the next ring.

Poison Ivy > anapplebright 
Alfred > mybffbatman 
Juliet > galofthelake 
Gwen > tombraiden 
Harley Quinn > come_on_puddin 
Dick > a_flyinggrayson 
The Joker > ahahaaahooo 
1966 Batman > preciselyrobin 
Brittany > amale_duck 
Rachel > onegoodlawyer 

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Ivy's plants trap Dean and plan to devour him.  Oh no!  But Nightwing swoops in with an assist.  

Ivy > poison_passions 

Gotham is just crawling with chicks in costumes on roofs.

Cassandra Cain > batgirliii 

When Dean runs into Catwoman herself, he finally has a chance to settle that argument with Claire.  And while he's at it, he's a very stupid man and makes out with her.

Catwoman > ninelivesleft 

[Log]  Dean and Bela rob Batman.  Still in progress, but... the end result is that they get the ring back.

Dean teases Sylar about his nerd history.

Dean takes note that Sylar sure has a lot of accomodations for being stuck in jail.  And insults Claire along the way.

Sylar tries to get Dean to explain his fear of flying.

Claire and Dean discuss shooting stars, ponies, and John Wayne.

Dean learns where Tess is from, exactly.

Dean and Brooke decide to play pool sometime. 

Becky needs to stop ruining Dean's life.

Dean and Cassie bitch about the Dean/Cassie fic and he says he'll kick anyone's ass who says that stuff about her.  Wichita throws in her opinion.

Wichita > wichita_kansas 

Other-Claire tells Dean she went to an alien bar and brought one home.  Dean's skeptical at best but agrees to come over and see it and have dinner and pie when he makes it back to NYC.

Father's Day:  Dean and Brooke talk on the phone about dads, and she gets him to open up about some of his history.

Dean catches up with Jo, and finds out she went on a demon hunt by herself, which he chastises her for it.  He agrees to let her come along and help as long as she follows orders.  They decide to go out for drinks and pool.

Other-Claire drops even more hints about how much she misses Dean in her life but he's an oblivious idiot.  Again.

Sylar drops the bomb that Candice is actually... not what she appears to be.  And laughs forever at Dean's pain as Dean attempts to erase all shreds of evidence from the internet that he had sex with her.

The Impala implores Dean to reach out to Sam again.  And find him a nice car of his own.

Cas doesn't really have anyone to talk about sex with other than Dean.  Nice and... awkward.

Dean is gonna kick your ass one of these days, Sylar.  And you too, Meme God.

Dean finds out about some dude who got into it with Cas at a bar.  He's upset to learn Cas doesn't know who Batman is either.  They discuss the next step in getting the rings back : Chuck Bass.

Dean goes to Brooke's to check on her, and is greeted by an angry little Stitch.  He pulls a gun on it again and Brooke freaks out when she walks in on this scene.  He finds out the little devil is Brooke's ~new pet~.

Dean and Babs talk about how the real monsters out there can be the people spreading hate in the first place.

Barbara Gordon > formerlybatgirl 

Sylar calls Dean from lockdown, after turning himself in to Angela.  Dean tells him about the rings and their plan to ask Death for assistance.  He promises to let Sylar know how it goes.

When Dean catches Claire disposing of bloodied clothing, he confronts her about what happened.  She admits she ran into Lucifer, but lies about the fact that he killed her, saying she jumped out a window to escape.  Dean's guilt complex kicks in and he tries to comfort her in his own... Dean way.  She tells him she hasn't talked to Sam yet, and they discuss strategies for dealing with him and making sure he doesn't lose it and storm off to confront Lucifer.

Dean tries to remind Other-Claire that she can't fix everyone's problems, and lets her know they appreciate her optimism.  They discuss how to track down Bela and the rings, and she volunteers Logan to try and put a bid on one.

When the cops catch Cassie lingering outside a liquor store, they try to assign her a social worker.  Dean says fuck that, and tells her if she needs booze, she should get him to buy it, instead of getting in trouble.  He's basically the best role model ever.  They go on a field trip to the liquor store together.

Dean and Chuck talk fangirls and their respective roles in life.  Or something.  Also, cheerleadering outfits and genderswapped Supernatural cos-players.

Chuck > endingsarehard 

Becky accosts Dean with her Wincest Manifesto, and he just... runs away, basically.  With the Impala.  She chases him on her moped, and he ... hates his life.

Becky Rosen > lickssam 

Dean accidentally wakes up Cas with a Metallica alarm clock.  They get in an argument about Cas' sleeping patterns, and Dean tries to convince him to sleep in the hotel like a normal person.  Cas says NO FUCK YOU I AM NOT A NORMAL PERSON and ... basically resolves to fight off sleep forever.  Except then he... goes back to napping.  After breaking Dean's heart by refusing to let Dean read him Goodnight Moon lest they get in a horrible car crash.  Yeah ...they have the best conversations.

Cassie has a vision of her mother dying, and Dean tries to convince her not to be fatalistic about it.

On Memorial Day, Dean gets the balls to call his father and is surprised to get an answer.  They're both... Winchesters about it.

AWKWARD PIZZA  CHEESEBURGERS.   Gabriel and Dean enact their amazingly ill conceived plan to... go convince Death to help them find the rings.  Between Gabe and Dean's dangerously timed snark-dick-measuring contest, and Dean's life being ruined by Manilow and Tom Jones, this is just... an amazing ride.

When Brooke finally gets exposed to Wincest, she also slips that there's internet porn of her out there.  She agrees to show Dean if he explains what the hell is up with there being Sam and Dean fanfic on the web.

Sam confronts Dean about losing the rings and royally fucking up.  SURPRISE, they get in a fight.   And... then have to talk about what to do next.

Cas really has... a lot to learn about being human.